#4 Top Funniest Short Clips Existing

Rude to Your Nurse? This will Learn Ya!

When you're hospitalized, it pays to be nice to your nurse:

. . . even when you're feeling miserable.

A bossy businessman learned the hard way after ordering his nurses around as if they were his employees. But the head nurse stood up to him. One morning she entered his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature." After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth. "No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated, "but for this reading, I can't use an oral thermometer."

This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his bottom.
After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce, "I have to get something. Now you stay just like that until I get back!" She left the door to his room open just a little on her way out, and he cursed under his breath as he heard people walking past his door laughing.

After almost an hour, the man's doctor came into the room. "What's going on here?" asked the doctor.

Angrily, the man answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"

"Yes," said the doctor. "But never with a carnation.

Todays Humor - Some Hilarious Airline Announcements

Occasionally, airline attendants and pilots make an effort to make the announcements a little more entertaining. Here are some real examples:

Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day. During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant came on the PA and announced, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate."

Another flight Attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."

After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight Attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt up against the gate, and once the tire smoke has cleared, and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal."

Pilot-"Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land...it's a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings, it affects the flight pattern."